What upset me so much that I reacted this way?

It was multiple factors, but what really set me off was whispered tells from someone nagging me about my healing assignments. And then pointing out that I always make the same mistakes with healing assignments. It's not that I can't take the criticism (which I normally can to a point) - it's the way in which it was delivered, the attitude behind it. It come to the point where I actually had to mute someone on vent, and was seriously considering putting them on my ignore list. This is a big problem when that person is someone with whom i actually DO need to communicate.

Look. I know you are just trying to help. I realize that when you explain, in great detail, over vent, repeatedly, every chance you get, exactly how, why, when, where, and WHO did everything wrong, you really are just trying to help us improve. I also realize that when you tell every single class how to play their class and ask why the &*%^ they don't just use such and such spell, and call them out for every mistake they make, you are just trying to be helpful. I know you are experienced and therefore you feel you have a right to talk non-stop OVER the raid leader. I know that when we mess up and you shriek into vent "SEE! I TOLD YOU SO!" that you are just.... well yeah i can't excuse that. You're just being a dick, sorry.

I will make another post about healer micromanagement, but right now I just need to vent. Why is it a problem when someone acts this way in a raid?

• You may think you are trying to help the raid, but what you are actually doing is trying to show your vast superior knowledge and experience. This is NOT for the good of the raid - it drags down the morale of the group as a whole, in order to raise your own individual self-opinion.
  
• The worst thing of all is that this RUINS focus. We couldn't get "in the zone" last night. I was a mess, and could not heal properly. People should have been topped off who weren't. There is no excuse for having 7 healers, and not having DPS topped off if they aren't doing anything wrong. Even Fulguralis noticed it, and normally he has both eyes staring greedily at the recount meter. (I'm just poking at you Ful!)
• If I were just another DPS, I could put the person in question on my ignore list, and mute them in vent. It's extreme, but if it's ruining my focus, and that person is not a raid leader, it may be the best thing to do. Unfortunately, as a healing lead, I really should not be doing that. I can't ignore you because if something DOES go wrong, I need to be able to hear what you may communicate.

More and more, this is leading me to a very drastic conclusion that I am loathe to accept. It may just be that I cannot raid with this person anymore. Usually, when someone says they aren't going to raid because of one individual, I have a "get over it" attitude. But when I'm trying to organize, communicate, and help lead, I can't just ignore them. He's been talked to repeatedly, and things change for a few days, and then go back to before and even get worse. I will even venture to say that at least last night he was telling me everything I was doing wrong via whisper. He used to just shout it out in vent - he's honoring our request to make it private, he's trying to improve, and it is still not enough for me.

If it's not a problem for anyone but me, then it is my responsibility to step down, to step out. This is my problem, and I should address it. And maybe the only way to address it is just to not come to the raid. It's not from some fit of pique, but more because I can't do my job, I cannot focus, and it upsets me far too much to be able to function properly.

Ack! Last week we made our first attempt on Hodir. One thing that always irritates me is when you are making your first attempt on a boss, and people start asking "why is dps soooo low! why are people taking so much damage?". It probably has something to do with the fact that we're learning a new fight. Sometimes you one shot bosses, other times you don't. Getting stressed about it is not going to fix it.

Usually I have to wipe at least a couple of times on a boss before I actually "get it". The problem I have with Hodir is that there are just so many things you need to avoid, and be near, and you are constantly running around. I can't constantly keep track of where I'm standing, where I need to be standing, AND looking at people's health bars. Or rather, I can, it's just going to take some time and practice. I imagine that for a lot of the DPS, particularly ranged DPS with long cast times and no DoTs (I'm looking at you mages!) it's just as difficult.

At least a lot of my heals are instant casts! Between shields, prayer of mending, renew, circle of healing, instant flash heals... I *should* be able to heal just fine. But the combination of trying to watch where my own feet land, AND heal other people making mistakes as they try to do the same thing, is pretty stressful. The thing is, I'm not going to complain about how the DPS is making my job harder because UR DOIN IT RONG. They're trying to learn the same fight I am. I can't really give them a hard time when I'm probably making the same mistakes they are and healing myself just as much. At least I *can* heal myself and get more practice.

What makes Hodir tricky for me, is that in addition to needing to know what buff each NPC gives, where not to stand, where you DO need to stand, and when to do all these things, I have to actually watch for these things. This may sound like a complete QQ to the DPS and tanks who have to do this on a regular basis, but in all honesty, I don't really see much of most fights. I see it out of the corner of my eye, and I have little problem getting out of various forms of noobsauce, but I'm not really watching it. I'm too busy staring at your health. At some point, I'll make a whole post about bad healer habits, and QQ about how the game is designed to not let us actually see the fights.

After practice, I will triumph over Hodir. As soon as I stop getting frustrated with others for getting so frustrated with the raid for not one-shotting this boss on our first 25 man attempt. In general, here's what to expect when learning new bosses. Please take note.

1. People will take lots of damage. 
   
2. DPS will not do as much damage.
3. Healers will run out of mana, if they don't die first.
4. Players will stand in bad things.
5. Players will forget to stand in good things.
6. Off-tanks will miss adds.

If you take down a boss for the first time ever on your very first try, and have none of these problems, then you should absolutely be happy and pat yourselves on the back for doing a really great job. However, if you do have the problems listed above, don't waste your energy getting frustrated. Wiping is part of progression, and practice makes perfect. Ask everyone to read up on all the Boss abilities on Wowhead, or watch a Tankspot video, but know that people learn different ways. The best way for almost everyone is to simply go at it again and again, and get hands on experience.

LYL Peeps - please see ETA below!

If you’ve raided at all within the past few weeks, you have no doubt noticed a very significant change Blizzard made in how BoP items are handled. Within two hours of a person looting that item, it can be traded to anyone else who was eligible for it. This is due quite a bit to how when Loot Masters made a mistake in the past, several people would actually have to make a GM ticket in order to get the problem fixed, when an item was accidentally given to the wrong person. Loot Mastering for a 25 man raid is a nightmare. Mistakes happen, and this change to BoP items was instended to help with that. I mean, isn’t it great? So much more flexibility! No more worries about accidental Loot Master errors! Loot Masters can now sit back and relax!

WRONG.

What a nightmare. This has caused so many new loot problems that have absolutely no enforceable or controllable solution, that our raiding team is practially in uproar. I suppose for people who raid with DKP, this isn’t a problem at all.

What is really sad, is that most of the problems are caused by people trying to be generous and help one another out.

We run on a tier system. An item drops, people roll on it, and whoever wins it moves down a tier. There are exceptions and open rolls for various things, like Runed Orbs, etc. People are given a certain amount of time to roll for loot, and then rolls are taken and closed down. There is no perfect amount of time to give people for rolling. Some people feel rushed, some feel like it’s taking too long.

What is happening is that people are rolling for an item and winning, and then experiencing what I call “roller’s remorse” afterwards. They now have the item, and they realize that it would have been a better upgrade to someone else who rolled, so they are kind and give the item to the person who would better benefit from it.

It sounds great. It sounds like exactly the sort of attitude we like to foster and encourage amongst our raiders. It is a complete nightmarish headache however.

At first we were giving people back their tiers and adjusting tiers when this happened. That adds even more time, confusion, and complication to looting. The second problem is that if this is the equivalent of withdrawing one’s roll, shouldn’t the item go to the person who would have won the item had the winner not rolled? Sometimes people were not giving it to the person next in line. Sometimes it can be hard to tell, because due to it being a tier system, one person might technically roll higher than another, but lose due to being on a different tier.

And the worst of all is that this system allows a conspiratorial maliciousness I never would have expected amongst our raiders – and is very difficult to prove has even happened.

Multiple people can get together and decide that tonight they are going to essentially “donate” all their tiers to one player. So they all roll together on items, and then whoever wins the item gives it to the designated player. It’s shady, and it’s unfair to those who don’t have multiple people rolling on items for them.

It brings up all kinds of loot debates. On one side, you can argue, you won the item – you can do whatever you want with it, including give it to whomever you choose. If you want to use your tier for a friend, is that your right? And then… how can we even prevent this? We have no way to control how items are handed about after it has been given to a player. There are different ways we can police it, but all these methods require a measure of time and effort on behalf of our officers that is not really reasonable for a casual raiding alliance.

Ideally you should be able to trust the people with whom you raid. Ideally everyone is working for the benefit of the whole raid. Ideally everyone likes one another, and wouldn’t go out of their way to simply screw another player over.

Ideally I could pull hundred dollar bills and flowers out of my butt.

I spent all day yesterday dealing with these loot issues and trying to find resolutions, and I suspect I will spend most of today trying to figure out if others have had these problems, and if there is any hope, EVER, that Blizzard will change this system, though I’m not feeling too hopeful.

What about you? Have you had any problems with this? Share with me your loot drama stories via comment so I don’t feel so bad about my own!

ETA (9/30/09) - There is a LOT of traffic coming to this page from the Lose Your Life forums - hai guyz welcome - I can't read the forum post that directs to this page. Are ya'll having a similar problem or did everyone just like the Loot Whore picture I found? ;) I'd love to know what ya'll's forum post said, if anyone would be kind enough to put it in the comments section here.

ETA - I have been scouring the forums, and have found very little on this subject - maybe it's just still too new of a change? I'm not sure, however BobTurkey made a really interesting post about it and the Black Market - you should check it out.